The Mummy Returns.

Review #2126: The Mummy Returns.

Cast: 

Brendan Fraser (Rick O'Connell), Rachel Weisz (Evelyn O'Connell / Nefertiri), John Hannah (Jonathan Carnahan), Arnold Vosloo (Imhotep), Oded Fehr (Ardeth Bay), Patricia Velásquez (Meela Nais / Anck-su-namun), Freddie Boath (Alex O'Connell), Dwayne Johnson (Mathayus of Akkad / The Scorpion King), Alun Armstrong (Baltus Hafez), Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje (Lock-Nah), and Shaun Parkes (Izzy Buttons) Written and Directed by Stephen Sommers (#201 - G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra and #1748 - The Mummy [1999])

Review: 

I did enjoy the 1999 Mummy film, albeit as a neat little romp. It did not exactly improve on previous films under that same title that had been released in 1932 or 1959, but as an action/effects feature with that general dose of horror, well, it worked out well. Sommers apparently was hesitant about doing a sequel, even if it was basically inevitable with the resulting success of that first film, which he had a hand in writing. In fact, he had described the original script of said film as "a bit reckless" before eventually getting to an "okay" result. Aside from an enlarged budget (which stems from a few raises to actors), not much has changed here, since over half-a-dozen actors from the first return here to go with a script done by Sommers. The film was a general success with audiences on the level of the original. The Scorpion King (2002), a spinoff film featuring, well, Dwayne Johnson reprising his role as the character of the same name, came out the year after this film and inspired its own run of films. Sommers did exactly one further horror-ish film with Van Helsing in 2004, which went pretty much where you would expect. A third Mummy film would come in 2008 with The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, which retained Fraser and Hannah only in cast while Sommers served only as a producer.

Well, sometimes you just can't win them all. 129 minutes somehow seems pretty disposable for a film that is just a bit short in comparison to the first film when it comes to holding itself together for overall cohesion. It is a bit too familiar to go with being bereft of effective pacing. Granted, Fraser and Weisz do still have a good deal of charm together, and in general one will be just fine with watching the film when it comes to looking for just spectacle (okay, maybe some of those effects don't help). They seem to enjoy the strangeness that comes with being in a sequel with less to do in quick charm, which is more than one can say for most middling sequels. At least the kid actor that comes for the film makes for a few chuckles, but if I am drawing straws by saying this for a film released in the new millennium, what is it saying about the parts as a whole? One sees folks like Hannah seem to be having some sort of fun being around here again (relief or otherwise), but the stakes don't seem as presentable here. One senses their attention start to drift even before a dirigible makes an appearance and boy do I wish I felt some sort of presence of terror in seeing the return of said mummy from before (complete with creating big water). It trots out pygmy mummies and past lives to go with utilizing wrestler-turned-actor Johnson mostly for spectacle sequences in the start and end (one to explain just what he has to do with anything and the other for effects that look as rushed as one could expect). Even the one sequence of a character getting killed seems destined to be undone for the climax, and, well, it is funny being right for the dumbest and shallow of things. As a whole, it just isn't as freshly interesting as its predecessor, managing to be as average as one painfully can see in countless other features that is merely just okay rather than fully satisfying in fun. It is a mild disappointment that pleases a few requirements but doesn't make for a great sequel in enough categories to recommend it more than once. The fluff just isn't enough here to be as good fluff as before.

Overall, I give it 6 out of 10 stars.

Next: Re-Animator.

The Other Guys.

Review #1707: The Other Guys.

Cast: 

Will Ferrell (Detective Allen "Gator" Gamble), Mark Wahlberg (Detective Terry Hoitz), Eva Mendes (Dr. Sheila Ramos Gamble), Michael Keaton (Captain Gene Mauch), Steve Coogan (Sir David Ershon), Ray Stevenson (Roger Wesley), Samuel L. Jackson (Detective P.K. Highsmith), Dwayne Johnson (Detective Christopher Danson), Lindsay Sloane (Francine), Natalie Zea (Christinith), Rob Riggle (Detective Evan Martin), Damon Wayans Jr. (Detective Fosse), and Viola Harris (Mama Ramos) Directed by Adam McKay (#526 - Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy, #693 - Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues, #1574 - The Big Short, and #1706 - Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby)

Review: 

Well, if you can make a movie that has fun with the conventions of the sports movie in stock car racing and make it intriguing for the whole family (at least the teenager kind), why not do a buddy cop movie? The idea for the film sprung from a dinner that McKay had with Ferrell and Wahlberg, as McKay noticed the chemistry present between the two that seemed ripe for a project. Of course, with the handful of buddy cop movies present, having it involve white-collar crime probably seems to prove an interesting way to mark it away from other examples (like 48 Hours or even stuff I haven't seen like Hot Fuzz) or seem too much like a copy of something like Law & Order (I joke, but listen carefully to who narrates the film anyway). This is the fourth of fifth collaborations between Ferrell and McKay, and it is the only one with Ferrell not serving as a co-writer (in this case, McKay wrote it with Chris Henchy), although he did provide input on ideas.

As a whole, it certainly has its hits and misses when it comes to landing its gags and moments, but it manages to land enough times for 107 minutes to make a somewhat worthy story about the ordinary (at least, for the police); it rides the clichés out for enough humor to make worthy entertainment, one that doesn't suffer when compared to McKay or Ferrell's other works. McKay certainly has an eye for trying to make each of his films have their own distinct little features that don't keep him pegged as just an improvisational director, and this works to his advantage when it comes to keeping interest on the level for the story at hand without being derailed by distractions. The film rides hard on how one views the chemistry between Ferrell and Wahlberg. It takes a bit of time for that dynamic to really hit it off, but it eventually gets its footing down with how they click within their differences (namely in their neuroses of manners and temper). While I might be more curious as how it would have been if they had reversed the roles (Ferrell playing a tough guy probably isn't a bigger stretch than Wahlberg playing an accountant), at least it seems like a game collaboration that doesn't seem constrained or forced, and Ferrell rides it out for a quite a few chuckles. Wahlberg adjusts fine to what has to happen with a film that could make either the straight man (depending on the scenario), and it does mean that he draws some laughs that eventually give way to a few action beats that work more to his advantage. Coogan plays things well when it comes to offbeat brashness that serves him well with the climax with Wahlberg & Ferrell, while Stevenson proves just as engaging as the snappy heavy. Mendes does fine, placed with Ferrell for a few little moments that hit okay as the one couple to show that a bunch of cop movies usually dance around. One can't tire of seeing Keaton on the screen, because even him playing a beleaguered captain (with a baseball reference I can appreciate) doesn't mean he can't make it charming to see from bit to bit. I do appreciate the brief moments between Johnson and Jackson, who get to chew on action clichés for a bit that makes for a worthy zinger (namely in trying to jump off more than one can chew). On the action side, the movie certainly does well enough with spacing out its sequences that doesn't delude the senses, and the story generally holds enough water to keep it mostly as a dutiful procedural. The chemistry between Ferrell and Wahlberg combined with a few supporting presences as a whole make for an engaging experience, one firmly in the middle as a buddy film that doesn't have too many hitches while hitting its overall targets with useful enterprise from folks who certainly know best.

Overall, I give it 8 out of 10 stars.

G.I. Joe: Retaliation.

Review #1702: G.I. Joe: Retaliation.

Cast: 

Dwayne Johnson (Marvin F. Hinton / Roadblock), Bruce Willis (General Joe Colton), Channing Tatum (Conrad S. Hauser / Duke), Jonathan Pryce (Zartan / President of the United States), Byung-hun Lee (Thomas Arashikage / Storm Shadow), Ray Park (Snake Eyes), Elodie Yung (Kim Arashikage / Jinx), Ray Stevenson (Firefly), D.J. Cotrona (Dashiell R. Faireborn / Flint), Adrianne Palicki (Jaye Burnett / Lady Jaye), Luke Bracey (Rexford G. 'Rex' Lewis / Cobra Commander; Robert Baker as voice), Walton Goggins (Warden Nigel James), Arnold Vosloo (Zartan), and Joseph Mazzello (Morris L. Sanderson / Mouse) Directed by Jon M. Chu.

Review: 

Do you remember G.I. Joe? All power to you then, because it has been essentially nine years since I last thought about it. G.I. Joe is a series of doll-I mean action figures that Hasbro began production on in 1964. There had been comics involving G.Is for decades, but Hasbro eventually came up with their own attempts at comics, with the most notable being a G.I. Joe series with Marvel Comics in the 1980s; an animated series also ran during that time that promoted the toy line and had its own film (which went from plans for a theatrical release to television after the failure of The Transformers: The Movie). At any rate, it should only make sense that a Hasbro property like this would eventually be turned into a live-action feature, seeing how Transformers (2007) turned out so "well". Five writers later, G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra (2009) came out to box office success amid ridicule from anybody looking for a good one to make fun of. I remember being twelve years old and seeing this movie in theaters only because I got a gift card to the movie theater as a present around that time,; I've probably seen that movie once or twice ever since, and its qualities haven't exactly improved since then. You don't really need me to tell you in a long spiel that it was a dumb movie, one catered to the tastes of script-logic akin to Transformers that had plenty of clunky moments.

So yeah, a sequel was warranted, and I guess it only makes some sort of arcane sense to get a director best known for dance movies to direct. The sequel was meant to be released in 2012, but Paramount Pictures (who in their odd wisdom wanted to do a reboot but not a reboot) shifted its release five weeks before its intended release because they wanted to convert the film to be shown in 3-D (because they wanted to make more money with a fad-I mean a great process for experiencing movies). Despite all of the hubbub, it was essentially just as successful as the original feature was (i.e. making back twice its budget). Eight years later, here we are talking about the release of a new G.I. Joe film...an origins story, which is amusing to think about (because hey, Transformers did it, so...). Anyway, this feature film was written by Rhett Reese and Paul Wernick, who were best known for their work on Zombieland (2009). You would think that making an ensemble cast movie series would mean that there is a bit of cast continuity between features...well, try again. Five cast members (Lee, Park, Pryce, Vosloo, Tatum) return from the previous film, and only two of them has a substantial speaking role as a hero (Park plays a mostly quiet ninja commando, but still). For a run-time of 110 minutes, this is a film that does the bare minimum in every department and flails slightly less than its predecessor in the art of balancing spectacle and the little thing they call "substance". Some movies can get away with being a fun time without having the greatest plot (like Commando, for example), but this is not one of those movies. There are not many sequels that are better than the first one that are also quite forgettable, but this sure is one of them. It is just a middling movie, one that fundamentally has no one great (or terrible) sequence to think about, because there are just a bunch of "eh" scenes with a plot that kind of floats around with a cast that doesn't have much footing to go around besides a few attempts at humor. Johnson surely seems like the kind of presence one would see coming to try and invigorate interest in a film, particularly since action seems to be right up his alley. While I can't say his performance is exactly anything good, he at least seems game for a movie with plastic ambitions at action with fairly solid composure; somehow, the filmmakers had the bright idea to kill off the lead guy of their first film with Tatum, and he looks about as interested as waiting for soup to cool off. Honestly, I can't tell which actor seems more in it for the money, Willis or Pryce (one gets to play the President and the other doesn't have to show up for almost a hour), and it is almost amusing to see them see them try to make these lines seem anything other than lines spoken by committee. I guess Lee does well here, in that he gets to a bit of swordplay and not have to wear a mask the whole time (as opposed to Park). The other members of the ensemble don't fare too well, seeming about as interested in talking action spiel as one would be interested in talking about the dynamics of why baseball is the greatest sport to follow to a bunch of Yankees fans. As a whole, what we have is a bland movie that goes boom a few times but never really goes farther than "do something!" in terms of maneuvering an interesting plot or characters beyond cliché. If one needs some sort of action fix in the modern era or need to waste time with people who should know better, at least make sure you check the whole totem pole of options before thinking about this one.

Overall, I give it 5 out of 10 stars.

Get Smart.

Review #1593: Get Smart.

Cast: 

Steve Carell (Maxwell Smart), Anne Hathaway (Agent 99), Dwayne Johnson (Agent 23), Alan Arkin (The Chief), Terence Stamp (Siegfried), Masi Oka (Bruce), Nate Torrence (Lloyd), Dalip Singh (Dalip), Ken Davitian (Shtarker), Terry Crews (Agent 91), David Koechner (Larabee), James Caan (The President), David S. Lee (Ladislas Krstic), Bill Murray (Agent 13), and Patrick Warburton (Hymie) Directed by Peter Segal (#466 - Nutty Professor II: The Klumps, #826 - Naked Gun 33 1/3: The Final Insult, and #1066: - The Longest Yard (2005))

Review:

If there is anything that the last few years have taught me, it is the value of finding television series from the past to look upon from start to finish and enjoy in all of its values, whether that means comedy or something else. Get Smart (created by Mel Brooks and Buck Henry) ran for five seasons from 1965 to 1970, with Brooks having a desire to create a "crazy, unreal, comic-strip king of thing about something besides a family", alongside the fact that the late 1960s had a boom in spy shows (with programs such as The Man from U.N.C.L.E. and The Avengers). It featured Don Adams as the main star, who was mostly known for his nightclub and television work prior to playing the role that made him an TV icon in Maxwell Smart. Barbara Feldon and Edward Platt co-starred in the show to the benefit of numerous humorous exchanges. 

The funny thing is that they already made a film adaptation of Get Smart, with The Nude Bomb (1980, having only Adams). It did not succeed well with anyone. A TV revival film and a short-lived revival series followed in the next few years, both having Adams and Feldon star among others (the revival had Andy Dick as a star - it did not succeed well with anyone). And yet, here we are, having to rely on the director that gave us the worst Naked Gun film. Sure, Peter Segal isn't a terrible director, in the same way that if you cloned ten of him you may end up with one possible movie of theirs that will actually be really interesting to view for laughs. This is not that time. Perhaps it is a coincidence that the film seems tedious by the first 25 minutes, because you could simply use that time to watch one Get Smart episode instead. Sure, the show did have its moments that don't quite age well (there are quite a few stereotypes present at certain episodes), but generally there was plenty to enjoy when it came to the bumbling efficiency portrayed by Adams that went with the clever clear-cut Feldon and the long-suffering Platt. What we have here is a joke of itself, mediocre in every which way with all of its obvious jokes that goes to show how much a modern comedy really can make you question the validity of time itself when it is 110 minutes long. The movie may not have a laugh track like the show, but it sure seems to play way too much for obvious moments way too much, and it manages to be excruciating in its attempt at mixing action and humor, making what was generally a comic spy show into an action spy comedy - for heaven's sake, the Austin Powers series wasn't even this bumbling in its stupidity. Incidentally, both feature at least one joke involving a fat suit - get it, because Max was fat, but now he isn't, truly the bastion of originality when it comes to updating old material to the modern age...if you are 12 years old. But hey, how many directors featured on Movie Night have had four consecutive stinkers featured?

By this point in time, perhaps Carell seemed like the exact choice for a bumbling lead, as he had managed to do well with The Office since its premiere on television in 2005 - at least when the show actually utilized him for worthwhile moments of humor as opposed to dumb gags. Little Miss Sunshine (2006) only furthered that curiosity. Here, he just seems mired in a lame situational role, where gags involving him seem to be easy to call out a few seconds before they actually happen. He seems trapped here, sorely missing that certain brazen charm that Adams had brought to the role that means more than just saying a line from before and hoping it sticks (having him be a bumbling rookie rather than just an established bumbler also doesn't gel). In other words, saying "would you believe..." is only really funny when the right timing comes along with it. The same goes for Hathaway, who only succeeds in making one realize just how Feldon did so well with silky smooth confidence that played really well with Adams on the show. Here, it is liking watching two actors engage in "Baby's First Action Comedy", one where you could almost replace one of them with a wax dummy and probably not notice half the time. She seems to deserve better here, because one doesn't find anything here to really find funny besides the occasional eye glance. It is all cliché with no fiber behind it. Johnson is okay, in the sense that if the film needs something with self-assured charm that he can deliver it, but anything else is too murky for him (the same can be said for anyone really, but I digress). Arkin does lend a laugh or so with an otherwise middle-ground imitation of what was done before, which is also reflected with Stamp (who isn't exactly trying to impersonate Bernie Kopell). Oka and Torrence supposedly are meant to be an amusing duo as side characters, but watching my cat mess around with cords is more amusing to take note of. At least Singh has it easy, since he doesn't talk much. Actually, the one real sticking point I can use to point out the contrast in TV and film is in Koechner, who while seeming like a decent comic presence in other films is sorely the wrong one to make comic antics come across with what the show brought to spies - it wasn't high brow stuff, but it surely had more to do with quirky joy than the pale action tones with sprinkles of jokes present here.

There were quite a few silly scenarios present in the show, why don't we recall some of them: One involved protecting a prince that needs to stay fat to still be prince, and there were countless ones involving smuggling (such as through dolls, circuses, and parrots). Here, writers Tom J. Astle and Matt Ember have merely caught a shell of what was done before, winking too much at itself with attempts at humor while its obvious attempts at capturing action feel flat. Would you believe...that there was an intent to make a sequel? Would you believe...that Carell wrote his own script for it? Would you believe...nobody really had interest to do a sequel? The answer to all these questions is a yes, with my condescension landing especially hard on the latter question, because this was a tiresome sit to really do. One could be generous when it comes to its attempt of comedy and action, but in the end it all comes down to preference with adaptation and the overall success rate of actually making a worthwhile successor to what was done before. In this case, there is no ray of hope in the proverbial sunshine to be found here, with a film that is a mundane malfunctioning modern-day mediocrity in of itself. You might say they missed it by that much - in this case, by a mile.

Overall, I give it 5 out of 10 stars.

Movie Night: Be Cool.

Review #517: Be Cool.

Cast
John Travolta (Chili Palmer), Uma Thurman (Edie Athens), Vince Vaughn (Roger "Raji" Lowenthal), Cedric the Entertainer (Sin LaSalle), Harvey Keitel (Nick Carr), Christina Milian (Linda Moon), André Benjamin (Dabu), Dwayne Johnson (Elliot Wilhelm), Robert Pastorelli (Joseph "Joe Loop" Lupino), Paul Adelstein (Hyman Gordon), and Arielle Kebbel (Robin) Directed by F. Gary Gray.

Review
I was in my living room, when a sudden urge came into me (No, it was not to eat more chicken), and it led me to pick Be Cool to review. So, like a fool, I decided to watch it. Hours later, I think I'll regret watching this film. It is not a bad film, it is a disappointing film that seems to either try way too hard (Multitudes and multitudes subplots) or try too little (Such as some of the acting), all springing into a lifeless "comedy" that seems to care about its cameos more then its actual actors. Travolta does okay, but his cast seems to not have any life in them, it seems the only one who cares enough to make an (positive) impression is Dwayne Johnson, who has some charm and likability even with a bad afro. The rest of the cast either range from okay (Cedric the Entertainer, who always seems to be fun to watch, but he's the only one in this film that is okay) to not really memorable (Milian, who is plagued by all the subplots) to just plain awful (Vince Vaughn, a baffling, yet lame choice), and they never click. It seems the comedy is overridden by the subplots and characters, which are endless and mostly annoying, in that order. Get Shorty was a fun flick that used the actor to their best talent. Be Cool uses their star power instead, and the film suffers because of it. Comparing these film would be impossible as this review would be 50 lines long, but I will close this review out by wondering if this film's true title was Sell Out.

Overall, I give it 3 out of 10 stars.

Movie Night: Planet 51.

Review #130: Planet 51.

Cast
Dwayne Johnson (Captain Charles "Chuck" T. Baker), Justin Long (Lem), Jessica Biel (Neera), Gary Oldman (General Grawl), Seann William Scott (Skiff), and John Cleese (Professor Kipple) Directed by Jorge Blanco.

Review
This film has an alright cast, with Johnson not having to do some gimmick to attract the viewers (Such as being a Tooth Fairy, a Quarterback with daughter issues) The plot is meh to say the least. The animation is decent, with reasonable voice acting. This film is not exactly a good film, being simple, but it does manage to make you chuckle or giggle at least a few times, being enough to entertain you for at least 91 minutes. Relatively harmless, but decent enough.

Overall, I give it 6 out of 10 stars.