Resident Evil: Extinction.

Review #2579: Resident Evil: Extinction.

Cast:  

Milla Jovovich (Alice), Ali Larter (Claire Redfield), Oded Fehr (Carlos Oliveira), Iain Glen (Dr. Isaacs), Ashanti (Nurse Betty), Mike Epps (L.J.), Spencer Locke (K-Mart), Jason O'Mara (Albert Wesker), Christopher Egan (Mikey), Madeline Carroll (White Queen), Matthew Marsden (Slater), Linden Ashby (Chase), and Joe Hursley (Otto) Directed by Russell Mulcahy (#2575 - The Shadow)

Review: 

“Horror films have always been a great passion of mine, so it’s great to get my hands on such a fantastic script. Visually, Resident Evil: Extinction is different from the previous two films.  The first one was quite claustrophobic; the next one was outside on wet night streets, and now, we take them out into the desert.  It has a very western feel but is futuristic, crazy and creepy.”

You might remember that Resident Evil (2002) was basically a piece of crap from Paul W. S. Anderson where the studio (as originally started by Constantin Film, who had the rights to the series since 1997) decided that rejecting George A. Romero and others was just peachy. And then came Resident Evil: Apocalypse (2004), which continued the road of going basically nowhere while namedropping a few video game character names that I'm sure fans of the series (as created by Shinji Mikami and Tokuro Fujiwara for Capcom) at least had a ball with for a second. I called it "hack spectacle" and don't really regret my assessment of a movie that spends most of its time at night. The third film of the series saw a veteran director with yet another Anderson script with Russell Mulcahy, who Anderson said had a "very distinct visual style" and apparently had storyboarded the film when he had their first meeting with the producers. For fun, enjoy this one quote from Anderson at the time of promoting the movie: "It's all part of trying to deliver a movie-going experience that satisfies the fans of the game but also provides a fun cinematic experience for a broader audience that has never played a Resident Evil game." With primary filming in Mexico (with various sets designed by Eugenio Caballero with special effects covered by Patrick Tatopoulos and his studio), the movie was enough of a hit, to, well, where Anderson ended up directing the next three movies starting with Afterlife in 2010.

If the producers really thought that these films felt like epics that were meant to keep things going for a saga of entertainment (read: money money)...they didn't really get as far as they believed with three straight stinkers in a row. Technically, this movie is the more interesting of the three because it at least simplifies things into the most obvious ways possible: crib from Mad Max (with more sand than brain cells) with the setting of the world going to hell and just hope people just go with killer crows and further "Alice is just doing this thing now because screw it" moments and at least meet it half-way. There is nothing new to really say about Jovovich besides the digital airbrushing done on close-ups because, well, it's the same wooden stuff that can't sell anything besides a few kicks even with the new development of, wait for it, multiple clones (ones seen with and without clothes) and further use of telekinesis because, screw it. There isn't much to connect one with the other besides being an action hero that can't lose and also can't make you think of them as anything other than being a pastiche of a pastiche. Larter plays it basically as the catch-all leader/buddy that makes you yearn for Final Destination (hey, you probably liked it more than me*) in actual conviction of the words spoken. The disposal of returning folks in Fehr and Epps, one in a pointless death and the other in a middling sacrifice, is regrettable because nobody really makes an impression in the film when not focused on, well, Alice (having a character named after Kmart and "I guess he does computers" is about all you get). Glen and his plan of what is basically "well, if you can't domesticate them, make a new type of zombie" is not particularly that interesting, mainly because most of the time in a locale less exciting than a board room (to say nothing of whatever is supposed to be the thing with O'Mara playing someone named Wesker that does even less).  So, yeah, it's a 5/10 in the face of such ridiculous aspects but at least you can see a movie try to break out...and not stick at anything. As a whole, the same lazy spectacle of a few decent zombie effects mixed in with middling action and an even sillier story makes for pretty much more of the same stuff you saw in the other two movies. But so it goes.

Overall, I give it 5 out of 10 stars.

Song of the day!

*Who among us doesn't get mad at a movie being a stinky bag of nothing? 

Resident Evil: Apocalypse.

Review #2528: Resident Evil: Apocalypse. 

Cast:

Milla Jovovich (Alice), Sienna Guillory (Jill Valentine), Oded Fehr (Carlos Olivera), Thomas Kretschmann (Major Timothy Cain), Sophie Vavasseur (Angela "Angie" Ashford), Razaaq Adoti (Sgt. Peyton Wells), Jared Harris (Dr. Charles Ashford), Mike Epps (Lloyd Jefferson "L.J." Wade), Sandrine Holt (Terri Morales), Matthew G. Taylor (Nemesis), Zack Ward (Nicholai Ginovaef), and Iain Glen (Dr. Alexander Isaacs) Directed by Alexander Witt.

Review: 

Hey, remember Resident Evil (2002)? I...uh, sort of remember it? Well, okay, I'm just going to perform straight plagiarism by reminding myself that I saw the movie was the kind of movie you could probably watch while doing your taxes. No, it did not spur me to try out the games.* But people bought tickets to see it, so I imagine there were plenty of tax forms all brought up for fun amidst a "treasure trove" of violence and effects. Paul W. S. Anderson* enjoyed doing the first movie but had commitments to Alien vs. Predator (2004) that meant he could not direct the sequel, although he served as a screenwriter and co-producer. Various inspirations ranged from the third game to Escape from New York (1981) and The Omega Man (1971). This was the directorial debut for Alexander Witt, who had been working in film since the 1970s in a variety of roles such as camera assistant, commercial director and second unit work on films such as who had done second unit work on films such as Speed (1994); Witt has mostly stayed around in second unit work in the two decades since the release of the film. The series returned with Resident Evil: Extinction (2007).

It is a movie where someone makes an entrance by crashing through a stained-glass window on a motorcycle. Honestly, the enjoyment level is a smidge above the first film, mainly because at least it tries to aim for action that isn't confined to a lab. It finds new and exciting ways of being a hack spectacle that doesn't do anything new with its zombie creatures or its new ensemble for Jovovich to blankly encounter. Some movies can coast on characters basically being described as "job description" or "the chick with the neat shorts" or "the funny guy" even with a shelf life above, say, 93 minutes. This is not one of those movies, because even horror movies in small locales such as, say, Chopping Mall (1986) had enthusiasm in its mayhem. Here, it just feels like the equivalent of going to the supermarket without a list in mind only to suffer a stubbed foot in the store has no A/C before realizing that the jug of milk expires today*. Jovovich has done little to nothing to really further a character that is doing the exact same thing as before in teaming up with a ragtag bunch to survive but not really showing leadership besides "don't die". It isn't even worth trying to talk about Kretschmann as a "villain" because the general maneuvering of the film just feels so cookie-cutter and so bland that it doesn't even feel worthy to make fun of the reveal of "Nemesis" (I know it is related to the game, because otherwise I'm surprised they didn't call it something sillier like Vengeance Knight or Deadman). It just feels like a movie you put on to, wait for it, to do your taxes while it is on in the background. Two movies in and I barely feel like I really care much about the "T-virus" or "Raccoon City", but hey, gotta move forward to see slow-moving creatures by mowed down. For whatever reason, I guess the setup of the next film will be that in addition to going around doing action sequences of shooting, our hero now has psionic abilities. Oh, and I guess Umbrella is fine with her escaping as part of their plan (some plan, the next one is called "Extinction"). As a whole, if you were a fan of the first movie, maybe you'll be right at home with this one in terms of spectacle, but it just came off as hollow middle-of-the-road noise.

Overall, I give it 5 out of 10 stars.

Song of the day!

*It's funny, the only horror game I played from start to finish was The House of the Dead: Overkill.

*You might remember that Anderson eventually married Jovovich. Cool, did they ever make a movie together that was actually good?

*I was going to use a bad experience in say, accidentally bumping into someone who likes to gab endlessly in small-talk, but I realize some of you may have friends that actually take the time to do so. Self awareness, pal!

Movie Night: Lara Croft: Tomb Raider.

Review #458: Lara Croft: Tomb Raider.

Cast
Angelina Jolie (Lara Croft), Daniel Craig (Alex West), Iain Glen (Manfred Powell), Jon Voight (Richard Croft), Noah Taylor (Bryce), Christopher Barrie (James Hillary), Julian Rhind-Tutt (Mr. Pimms), and Leslie Phillips (Wilson) Directed by Alex West.

Review
The first video game movie reviewed here, and...eh? There's not much to say about Lara Croft: Tomb Raider, it's not terrible, but it's not good either. The actors are okay, except for Jolie, who is probably one of the better actors in this film. The action is a mixed bag, sometimes it looks interesting, but the decent action is undercut by the occasional slow motion shots, which is unnecessary and adds nothing to the film other than making the film about 5 seconds longer. The plot is muddy, and feels like a rejected Indiana Jones script, which either makes Kingdom of the Crystal Skull better or worse in comparison. The film doesn't last too long, though I do wonder how you can make a villain so obvious in the first 15 minutes. It's a mediocre film, it strives for adventure and only that, succeeding easily, yet emotionally vacant, so I guess it works for some.

Overall, I give it 5 out of 10 stars.