January 5, 2017

College Road Trip.


Review #894: College Road Trip.

Cast: 
Martin Lawrence (Chief James Porter), Raven-Symoné (Melanie Porter), Eshaya Draper (Trey Porter), Donny Osmond (Doug Greenhut), Molly Ephraim (Wendy Greenhut), Kym Whitley (Michelle Porter), Brenda Song (Nancy Carter), Margo Harshman (Katie Crazyman), Arnetia Walker (Grandma Porter), Vincent Pastore (Freddy), and Lucas Grabeel (Scooter) Directed by Roger Kumble (#838 - Just Friends)

Review: 
Of course this movie is terrible. What do you expect? This is the kind of fare meant for younger audiences than I (a 20 year old college student who clearly should be doing better things on break), and while it is easy to admit that some could get a kick out of this movie, it is also evident that this was a dull thing to watch. It even lasts less than 90 minutes (of course), which means this isn't a movie I can't say I wasted too much time on. Lawrence seems more interested in seeing the film end than actually making his character anything other than just a weird dad with typical issues with his daughter, with one of his stunts being to sneak over to a dorm her and her friends are sleeping over to see if there are any boys there (writing this whole sentence made my head hurt)...and he ends up trapped under one of the beds. Raven is fine, but she seems to go through the motions much like the people who end up watching the movie. The only sort of interest was seeing Donny Osmond (of all people) be in the movie for about five minutes (oh, and at the end), if only because it reminded me that the only other time I ever saw Osmond in anything was when he hosted the game show Pyramid (remember that? That was over a decade ago. Oh, and the song "White & Nerdy". You know, these sentences are almost more interesting than talking about the movie...but I digress). Granted, it's him playing an overly energetic character, but it's probably the only thing about the movie worth discussing (that, and him attacking the fiance of his daughter.). Not even a pig (one of those smart ones, because that's a thing) can contribute to any real gags. This just feels like a television movie that was put into theaters, in part because of bland it is. There's nothing terribly offensive (not that there would be), nor anything that you wouldn't find in TV movies. I'd care more, but at least I never had to make a college road trip of my own.

Countdown to #900: 10, 9, 8, 7, 6...

Overall, I give it 4 out of 10 stars.

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