College Road Trip.

Review #894: College Road Trip.

Cast: 
Martin Lawrence (Chief James Porter), Raven-Symoné (Melanie Porter), Eshaya Draper (Trey Porter), Donny Osmond (Doug Greenhut), Molly Ephraim (Wendy Greenhut), Kym Whitley (Michelle Porter), Brenda Song (Nancy Carter), Margo Harshman (Katie Crazyman), Arnetia Walker (Grandma Porter), Vincent Pastore (Freddy), and Lucas Grabeel (Scooter) Directed by Roger Kumble (#838 - Just Friends)

Review: 
Of course this movie is terrible. What do you expect? This is the kind of fare meant for younger audiences than I (a 20 year old college student who clearly should be doing better things on break), and while it is easy to admit that some could get a kick out of this movie, it is also evident that this was a dull thing to watch. It even lasts less than 90 minutes (of course), which means this isn't a movie I can't say I wasted too much time on. Lawrence seems more interested in seeing the film end than actually making his character anything other than just a weird dad with typical issues with his daughter, with one of his stunts being to sneak over to a dorm her and her friends are sleeping over to see if there are any boys there (writing this whole sentence made my head hurt)...and he ends up trapped under one of the beds. Raven is fine, but she seems to go through the motions much like the people who end up watching the movie. The only sort of interest was seeing Donny Osmond (of all people) be in the movie for about five minutes (oh, and at the end), if only because it reminded me that the only other time I ever saw Osmond in anything was when he hosted the game show Pyramid (remember that? That was over a decade ago. Oh, and the song "White & Nerdy". You know, these sentences are almost more interesting than talking about the movie...but I digress). Granted, it's him playing an overly energetic character, but it's probably the only thing about the movie worth discussing (that, and him attacking the fiance of his daughter.). Not even a pig (one of those smart ones, because that's a thing) can contribute to any real gags. This just feels like a television movie that was put into theaters, in part because of bland it is. There's nothing terribly offensive (not that there would be), nor anything that you wouldn't find in TV movies. I'd care more, but at least I never had to make a college road trip of my own.

Countdown to #900: 10, 9, 8, 7, 6...

Overall, I give it 4 out of 10 stars.

Just Friends.

Review #838: Just Friends.

Cast
Ryan Reynolds (Chris Brander), Amy Smart (Jamie Palamino), Anna Faris (Samantha James), Chris Klein (Dusty Lee Dinkleman), Christopher Marquette (Mike Brander), Julie Hagerty (Carol Brander), Stephen Root (KC), Fred Ewanuick (Clark), and Amy Matysio (Darla) Directed by Roger Kumble.

Review
Have you ever heard of the friend zone? If you said yes, congratulations, you get to suffer through a turgid movie based on that term. If you said no, congratulations, you get to suffer through a boring movie based off that term. Look, being friends with someone is great, because then you don't have much to lose when you do something embarrassing in their midst, like doing anything from this movie.
It manages to fail at being a romance and a comedy because it's never interesting in the former case, and it's never anything other than boring in the latter case. The biggest problem in the movie is the plot itself, because who could possibly root for a main character like this? This might've been better as a dark comedy, or even a drama, but that's asking too much, I guess. The other big problem is that the characters seem to just act weirdly different from scene to scene, which makes the scenes between Reynolds and Smart especially perplexing. It doesn't help that there's a love triangle (of course) that only makes the inevitable ending sloggier. There's never a scene where it clicks that these two should actually be together. Reynolds is at least somewhat entertaining, but his chemistry with Smart actually manages to have less spark than his chemistry with Faris, the only other person that seems to be trying in this movie. She has a good deal of pep for a character that doesn't really get much plot development. The supporting cast isn't much to talk about, either. (except Julie Hagerty, only because it makes me want to watch her in Airplane! (#664) again) It's not so much the gags aren't funny as they just aren't that much to work up frustration over (there is, however, a sort of strange satisfaction in not seeing The Notebook before seeing this film). If you've seen one person in a fat suit, you've seen them all, and it doesn't make the movie any funnier in the little time it's used. If you've seen one romantic comedy, you've seen them all, and this one really is no different, with an ending that makes sense if you live in opposite world. Or if you're a writer looking for a way to reconcile two characters without giving much reason to. Look, if you're looking for a movie with Ryan Reynolds having a decent amount of charm or a good romantic comedy...see Deadpool (#779) instead. You want my advice? Go watch another movie with a friend.

Overall, I give it 4 out of 10 stars.